By Britt Schramm
August 15, 2005
Well, whoever had today in the office pool is the big winnah. It’s my 25th column for MPS and I’ve decided to get drunk on that seductive temptress that’s called bitterness. That’s right; I’ve fallen off the “kinder and gentler” wagon and landed face first into the gutter of bitter comic fandom. As you may know, I’ve tried to suppress some of the happening in comics that have made me throw up my hands in disgust. I’ve struggled to accept that I can’t do anything to change the course of comics with my bare hands. But there comes a point and time where I just can’t take it anymore.
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What does that mean to you, my dear readers? Well, I’m just going to tee off on the subjects that are getting under my skin like a ‘roid needle in Raffy’s arm (or butt if you believe Jose Canseco and who doesn’t right now?). So, if you can’t handle blatant use of hyperbole and some gritty language, I suggest that you turn away right now and look for something to read that may interest you – like the USA Today’s Life section or People magazine. For the rest of you that want to continue, pray to the God of your choosing and hold on tight. It’s gonna be a bumpy ride.
Countdown to Infinite Crisis/House of M: Did I call this or did I call this? Both of these series are guilty of gluttony as well as greed to the highest degree. Really, is it that necessary of a crossover series that it has to involve itself (whether directly or indirectly) with almost every friggin’ title that’s being published by the Big Two? I’m getting tired of going into the store and seeing more than half of the titles on the New Release rack related to one or the other.
This is not just a problem; it’s an epidemic. It’s has gotten to the point that I have boycotted anything that has to do with those monstrosities. No Villains United or OMAC junk up in here. There’s no House of M or Mutopia crap clogging my sub list. As Positive K and Mc Lyte once said, “I’m not having it.”
Yeah, maybe I am being overly critical of DC and Marvel, as they have to do things to generate revenue to their shareholders. But (as I’m sure that I’ve said before), the money that they’re earning is off the backs of their regular readers, not the casual fan who has seen this type of snake-oil salesmanship in previous crossover series.
I just want comics to be just that – comics in its truest form, which is a story that is told in a sequential art form. Now that could be over a single issue or over multiple ones. But to ask me, as a consumer, to buy what seems like a year’s worth of issues in a 3-month time span is asinine. Not this type of money-grubbing, grab people by the ankles and shake them until money falls to the ground type of strong-armed robbery. I’m tired of being taken advantaged of repeatedly for the sake of some rich fat cats in New York.
Invasion of The Variant Covers: I’m not as bitter over this issue but I haven’t commented on this quick money grab since my first column here at the ‘Shoot. But now that I’ve become “Bitter Boy” for this column, I hafta say something about it.
I was jockeying the register this past Saturday at the store when this guy comes in and buys the following items: two issues each of Supergirl, All-Star Batman & Robin, and Alex Ross’ Justice. What was the reason for the duplication? Obviously, it wasn’t to give a friend so they could read them and enjoy the creative medium that is the comic book. No, it was for the variant covers.
Yes, I know. It’s shocking to hear that people still buy both covers in today’s society. Don’t people realize that there’s no speculator market for this crap if you don’t allow it? The power is in our hands to stop these stupid secondary market price gougers from affecting the actual monetary worth of the comic book. Don’t give in to temptation, fellow comic book readers.
Please do me a favor the next time that you see that pricey variant cover by Michael Turner or Joe Madureira. Move your hand away from your wallet (or mouse as the case may be) and walk towards the nearest exit. Yeah, if you buy it, you may get to own a reproduced new cover to the comic that you already own. But you’ll become poorer in more ways than one. For the record, I didn’t see any by Marvel in the last couple of weeks but I’m sure that their time is coming. I’m telling you; you can’t trust either of them.
Wizard, Atlanta and Hero-Con: I’m sure that you’ve heard about this fiasco from other news sources but here’s my view on the topic. Wizard, as a corporation, has become corrupted by their unbelievable and unadulterated influence on the comic book consumers by thinking that they could screw over the Heroes Con in Charlotte. I made a short post about this subject on a more “personal” website (if you catch my drift) but I would like to expound on it, if I may.
Wizard, when it first came out, was great. Finally, a magazine had all the stuff that I wanted to know. There was in-depth info about the upcoming months’ comics and plenty of interviews with the creators who made them. However, it was also 1991 so the collector boom was still in full effect mode. So, with no other way to gauge the market, a price guide was needed to keep track of all the trends of the time like the previously mentioned variant covers or the hot books coming out like Image’s Youngblood and Valiant’s Harbinger. And Wizard brought that on a monthly basis in a nice pretty package.
Let us fast-forward to today. Thanks to the Internet, everyone can find out the latest developments and behind-the-scenes gossip with a click of the mouse instantaneously. eBay is now the current market indicator of the after-market price of comics. Subscriptions to some forms of print media are on the downward trend. I’m sure that the people at Wizard probably can see the writing on the wall.
Accordingly, they start branching out into non-media based products like Black Bull Entertainment and forging relationships with other companies like CGC Comics Grading (the truest proof that Satan has bought his way into comics – but that’s just my personal opinion). But Wizard has found their true cash cow – hosting comic conventions throughout the country.
Now, I’m all for conventions. They’re fun (for the most part) and they bring tons of people to one huge hall and allow comic book fans to interact with the creators of the books that they read every month. I mean, who wouldn’t like to hear the story behind the hot Zombie/Cow loving from Zombie King #0 from the mouth of the man who created it, Frank Cho? You sometimes can’t put a price on that stuff.
However, Wizard can’t leave well enough alone and have to put their signature stamp on the comic convention. There has to be guests of honor, tiered event pricing and exclusive show merch tied to ticket sales like a variant cover to existing comic books, of course.
Not surprisingly, these Wizard World cons have spread like locusts. First, there was only Chicago. Now there are a total of five with Chi-town, Philly, Texas, LA and the newest one in the heart of Beantown, New England. And up until a couple of months ago, Atlanta was next on the hit list. That is, until they decided to hold it on the wrong date.
Ya see, they decided to hold their Atlanta Con the same time as the Heroes Con in Charlotte, NC. What they failed to realize was how beloved this small southern convention is and how much of a backlash they would receive if they tried to steamroll over Shelton Drum and his party. Needless to say, Wizard has backed away from even scheduling an Atlanta event and has tried to distance themselves from the whole fiasco.
Funny, Wizard used to cover the news of the comic business and now it’s becoming more part of the business than the media. It was loved and now it is reviled. It’s like Night and Day, right Al B!
Exclusive Signings: How absurd is this idea? Either DC or Marvel announces that they have signed such and such to an exclusive one-year contract. However, this exclusivity does not exclude the other books that are still coming out at their old place of business or the ongoing pet project that they’re still working on for another company.
Huh? Am I missing something? Where’s the exclusivity in that contract? That’s like me releasing a press statement stating that I’ve gone exclusive with Movie Poop Shoot but that I’m still writing from my website since it’s my baby as well as Kung Fu Rodeo since I have some content that is still making its way through the creative pipeline. Yeah, that sounds real exclusive, if you ask me. It’s about as exclusive as doing the nasty with Tara Reid. By the way, can you smell that? That’s sarcasm, boys and girls.
Seriously, don’t be fooled by these announcements. They’re nothing more than an opportunity for either company to get their names in Newsarama. You should treat these announcements for what they are – hype machine bullshit.
Late Creators: I credit with talking about this bone of contention that I have to my friend Heidi . To me, there’s nothing that kills the momentum of a good story other than waiting four months in between issues. And for some creators, that’s being generous.
Right now, this problem is affecting both Iron Man solo books. The current continuity (or whatever is called at Marvel) book is written by Warren Ellis. If you don’t know Mr. Ellis’ work, you are missing some quality craftsmanship with titles like Stormwatch/Authority, Planetary, Ministry of Space and Global Frequency. However, if you are familiar with his work, you are also familiar waiting. Not just a month or so – it’s more likely that you’ll see “Arrested Development” on TV more than see a Warren Ellis book on the New Release rack. Planetary is becoming almost as legendary for the gaps between issues as its quality. It is almost inherent in his books. They will ship late. If you can’t handle that, I suggest waiting for the trade.
The other Iron Men title, Ultimate Iron Man, is following in the same footsteps. Famed Sci-Fi author Orson Scott Card is matching Ellis issue for issue on his first foray into the four-color medium. And I’m sure that he’s a great writer, but it’s not as if he’s creating a completely new character here. It’s still Tony Stark building an electronic arsenal so he can wear it around to save people. If the original material is being used as an old blueprint, updating it shouldn’t be too hard. And yet, it seems like the series has been going on since the beginning of the year (actually it started in March) and it’s only on issue 3. Ughhh.
(And I know that this is not technically under the shipping late department but can anyone figure out the weird shipping schedule of Seven Soldiers of Victory by Grant Morrison? Again, this is another series that I’ll wait to read in trade form since it’s too massive to read separately. But I try to read it when they come in and I’m finding it difficult to grasp what comes out when. Maybe it’s my pea brain but I thought that there was seven books coming out and I’ve only seen Klarion, Guardian, Zantanna, and Shinning Knight. Where are the others books like Frankenstein and Vigilante? How long is this thing gonna last? How does my homegirl Amerie stay in such bootilicious shape? These questions cannot continue to be left unanswered.)
Great Quality of OGN, TPBs, and Small Press: To show that I still have proper perspective and because I want to end on a positive note, I want to get more shout-outs to the other end of the comics’ spectrum – the Small Press. If you missed the last column, shame on you. Some great books out there don’t involve superheroes that you should be reading.
And the hits just keep on coming. Top Shelf has just released what I would consider a monster July with books like "Tricked", "Spiral Bound" and "The King". I can’t remember a time where one company had three great books come out within weeks of each other. That’s tough act to follow. But IDW looks like they have a couple of hits on their hands with titles like "Dampyr" and the relaunch of "Angel", which are worthy additions to their already strong catalog. And I don’t want to forget Boom Studios with their diverse selections like the zombie anthology aptly titled “Zombie Tales”, the satirical superhero story, “Hero Squared”, and the soon-to-be-released "G.I. Spy", an American super spy but this guy is not like your father’s James Bond.
These companies, along with many others, are just a couple of examples of what is good about comics. Just because they’re not all dressed in brightly colored clothes doesn’t meant that they’re not good. That type of fashion statement didn’t work for E’Nuff Z’Nuff and the same can be said of comics.
That’s it for now, kiddies. Don’t forget to keep your bags and boards together and your continuity straight. See you next time.
Send column-specific e-mail using the link below. You can also read about my hatred for Madden 2006, my musings about the new Chicago curse or discusing the finer points of reality TV at brittschramm.com. Plus, I also review anything and everything that has to do with Pop Culture at Kung Fu Rodeo.
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